I’m going to tell you a story. Are you sitting comfortably? Right, then I’ll begin.
Once upon a time (75 million years ago to be more precise) there was an alien galactic ruler named Xenu. Xenu was in charge of all the planets in this part of the galaxy including our own planet Earth, except in those days it was called Teegeeack.
Now Xenu had a problem. All of the 76 planets he controlled were overpopulated. Each planet had on average 178 billion people. He wanted to get rid of all the overpopulation so he had a plan.
Xenu took over complete control with the help of renegades to defeat the good people and the Loyal Officers. Then with the help of psychiatrists he called in billions of people for income tax inspections where they were instead given injections of alcohol and glycol mixed to paralyse them. Then they were put into space planes that looked exactly like DC8s (except they had rocket motors instead of propellers).
These DC8 space planes then flew to planet Earth where the paralysed people were stacked around the bases of volcanoes in their hundreds of billions. When they had finished stacking them around then H-bombs were lowered into the volcanoes. Xenu then detonated all the H-bombs at the same time and everyone was killed.
The story doesn’t end there though. Since everyone has a soul (called a “thetan” in this story) then you have to trick souls into not coming back again. So while the hundreds of billions of souls were being blown around by the nuclear winds he had special electronic traps that caught all the souls in electronic beams (the electronic beams were sticky like fly-paper).
After he had captured all these souls he had them packed into boxes and taken to a few huge cinemas. There all the souls had to spend days watching special 3D motion pictures that told them what life should be like and many confusing things. In this film they were shown false pictures and told they were God, The Devil and Christ. In the story this process is called “implanting”.
When the films ended and the souls left the cinema these souls started to stick together because since they had all seen the same film they thought they were the same people. They clustered in groups of a few thousand. Now because there were only a few living bodies left they stayed as clusters and inhabited these bodies.
As for Xenu, the Loyal Officers finally overthrew him and they locked him away in a mountain on one of the planets. He is kept in by a force-field powered by an eternal battery and Xenu is still alive today.
That is the end of the story. And so today everyone is full of these clusters of souls called “body thetans”. And if we are to be a free soul then we have to remove all these “body thetans” and pay lots of money to do so. And the only reason people believe in God and Christ was because it was in the film their body thetans saw 75 million years ago.
Well what did you think of that story?
What?
You thought it was a stupid story?
Well so do we. However, this story is the core belief in the religion known as Scientology.* If people knew about this story then most people would never get involved in it. This story is told to you when you reach one of their secret levels called OT III. After that you are supposed to telepathically communicate with these body thetans to make them go away. You have to pay a lot of money to get to this level and do this (or you have to work very hard for the organisation on extremely low pay for many years).
We are telling you this story as a warning. If you become involved with Scientology then we would like you to do so with your eyes open and fully aware of the sort of material it contains.
Most of the Scientologists who work in their Dianetics* centres and so called “Churches” of Scientology do not know this story since they are not allowed to hear it until they reach the secret “upper” levels of Scientology. It may take them many years before they reach this level if they ever do. The ones who do know it are forced to keep it a secret and not tell it to those people who are joining Scientology.
Now you have read this you know their big secret. Don’t let us put you off joining though.
* Dianetics and Scientology are trademarks of the Religious Technology Centre. This document is not connected with that organisation in any way.
The brown colored text are links, I could not make them more readable by changing the colors without breaking the links. Sorry ya’ll.
Tom Cruise has personally, PERSONALLY, been pwned. This weekend, an anonymous Internet group (named Anonymous — these are not masters of subtlety) started a war with the Church of Scientology by hammering the group’s web site; Scientology.org is down after a brief traffic spike. This isn’t the only group of Internet users unafraid of the intimidating cult; a whole range of sites has turned the Church into a mockery by doing what mainstream celebrity-coverage outlets wouldn’t dare. Here’s a guide to the war (and a creepy manifesto made by The Internet!).
Anonymous
This loose group of Internet vigilantes (vaguely centered around, but not officially connected to, the site 4chan) often harasses unsavory but small-time people, but they did help with the arrest of pedophile Chris Forcand. Their usual tactic is a simple denial of service attack like the one against Scientology.org, but they occasionally get more sophisticated; members tell me they plan to hoist banners above some Church branches. Inspired by the release of Tom Cruise’s secret Scientology video and the Church’s attempts to suppress it, Anon promises an all-out war in the following hokey but entertaining video:
Digg The users are less aggressive, but Digg is a promotion machine for stories users feel are overlooked by the media. They love to stick it to the man, and they love the freedom of information. That’s why the many popular Scientology criticisms on Digg focus on the Church’s history of censorship. Digg promoted the Cruise video, but they gave much more love to the Church’s takedown letter to Gawker.
YouTube
The Church got the Cruise video removed from the site, but within a few days a new copy was up. Meanwhile there are plenty of parodies less likely to be deleted. The Church may have plenty of money to litigate, but if it tries to force the issue with YouTube, it’ll find itself up against Google, which loves fighting bogus copyright claims.
YTMND
The site is usually just a jumble of in-jokes, but after several users mocked Scientology’s mythology, user Smoothmedia designed a presentation accusing the Church of destroying several lives and harassing critics. There’s a copy on YouTube (which was popular on Digg, natch):
Mainstream media has criticized the Church too, but the most famous examples are parodies from comedy shows like South Park (in an episode later censored by Comedy Central) and Craig Ferguson’s Late Late Show (which still didn’t run footage from the actual video). Maybe media outlets don’t want to lose pull with Cruise and his celebrity friends, or maybe they just don’t care, but the Internet’s doing a great job exposing the dangers of the cult. Thank Xenu for immature Internet teenagers!
You have to watch this video. It shows Tom Cruise, with all the wide-eyed fervor that he brings to the promotion of a movie, making the argument for Scientology, the bizarre 20th-century religion. Making the argument is an understatement. The Hollywood actor, star of movies such as Mission Impossible, is a complete fanatic. “When you’re a Scientologist, and you drive by an accident, you know you have to do something about it, because you know you’re the only one who can really help… We are the way to happiness. We can bring peace and unite cultures.” There’s much much more. Let me put it this way: if Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah’s couch was an 8 on the scale of scary, this is a 10.
This video’s been passed around privately by reporters and writers investigating Cruise’s ties with Scientology. Most reporters have been wary of taking on the Scientologists, because they have a history of both litigation, and the harassment of critics. The publication of Andrew Morton’s biography of Tom Cruise, which claims he is the second most powerful person in the cult, has seems to have opened the floodgates. Several indoctrination videos were available on Google Video, on Sunday, and showcased on Gawker, before being removed by the person who had originally posted them. Yesterday, for a few hours, the clip of Tom Cruise discussing his beliefs as a Scientologist appeared on Youtube, and was republished by Radar and Defamer. That video is no longer available, most likely after the Church of Scientology sent in a copyright infringement notice. Gawker is now hosting a copy of the video; it’s newsworthy; and we will not be removing it.
"How2BecomeAChristian.info (with a numeral 2) Ministries" main purpose is to honor and glorify the biblical historical Jesus Christ. To do this, the ministry takes a stand for the historical orthodox Christian faith and doctrine. By providing educational and research material, we hope to strengthen and empower those who have heeded the divine call to defend the Christian faith in these later days. To be ready “in and out of season”, to give the reasons for which we believe in our Lord Jesus Christ and stand for the historical mainline Christian faith.
“What,” says Satan, “do you hold to these denominational creeds? Sensible men are
getting more liberal, they are giving away what does not belong to them—God’s
truth; they are removing the old landmarks. Acts of uniformity are to be repealed,
articles and creeds are to be laid aside as useless lumber, not necessary for this very
enlightened age; fall in with this, and be an Anythingarian” - Charles Haddon Spurgeon
“To answer objections, is an endless task; it is like trying to empty a flowing fountain with bottomless buckets.” - Charles Haddon Spurgeon
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